I Would Like to Call It Beauty - Corrine Bailey Rae

i am about to impart to you a little theology with my son. let me first say that he may have been to church 6 or 7 times in his life. yes, we're THOSE people. we have the occasional religious book given to him by my mother, and when we see her, she sings songs like 'jesus loves me' to the kids. i'm not aware of any further indoctrination, but clearly, em has been thinking about this. if i had one wish, i think at this point i'd like to live in my elder son's head for a day.

em: god is always watching over us.

me: um. really?

em: yes. he can see us everywhere.

me: wow, buddy. where'd you hear that?

em: oh, i don't know. i just know it, i guess. god's a man who can see us.

me: did mimi tell you that? or nana? or did you read it in a book?

em: no, mama. i just know it.

me: really? what else do you just know?

em: god's a man who lives in outer space. he's made of cold air.

me: oh. that's really interesting.

em: yeah. i think it is. he was made in the big bang. and he lives in outer space and watches over us.

me: watches over us? what does that mean? does he help us?

em: no, he just watches us. that's all. and he controls the weather. and whatever color the weather is, that's what he looks like. so if it's raining, he's kind of blue. if it's sunny, he's yellow like the sunshine.

me: what if there's a rainbow?

em: well, then, he's rainbow-colored, mama. and since he's made of cold air, if he touches you, it feels cold. oh, and you know what else? when you die, he dies, too.

me: and how do you know all this again?

em: MAMA, I JUST KNOW IT. why do you keep asking me that?

yep, folks. this is the end product of not taking your kid to church and having grandparents who wish you would. he's cobbled his own little ideas together and VOILA. em's own little religion. are we totally going to hell for this? the jury's still out, i think.